Help me Shaun B-wan Hammit, you're my only hope!

General Fiero Maintenance including oil changes, air filters, suspension refreshes, restorations, painting, etc.

Moderators: The Dark Side of Will, Series8217

Post Reply
whipped
Posts: 4719
Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 11:17 am
Location: Bomb shelter, FL

Help me Shaun B-wan Hammit, you're my only hope!

Post by whipped »

Dude... you have to help me. My gf is sleeping with my neighbor. He drives an 84 Chevy S10. It has a snorkle, so it can go offroading in the water.

How can I make my fiero cooler than his s10? I'd need like 10 roof wings, but I can only afford cardboard! :scratch:
User avatar
Shaun41178(2)
Posts: 8415
Joined: Fri Nov 19, 2004 7:12 pm
Location: Ben Phelps is an alleged scammer

Post by Shaun41178(2) »

I think I can help you young padowan.

The first thing you need to do is ditch whatever car you have and go directly to an S-10. Preferably something newer then an 84. Look for something with MPFI because the ladies' gynes get wet when they are in a car that doesn't throw up clouds of black smoke behind them. She probably likes the IDB in the bed of the truck which is prob why she ditched you. So if you get a S-10(preferably an extended bed;more room to stretch out) not only will this help get her back, but it will also allow you to go IDB stylez.

Second thing you need to do is get a snorkel. No not for the truck although you can if you want, but a snorkel like ones for swimming and or diving. You can use this long black snorkel to jam it in her number 2 :bootyshake: while you are licking on her number 1 :downtown:. Girls go nuts for this. Trust me I know.

Third thing you need to do is buy black condoms and keep lots of :ky: handy. Not only does it make your wang appear longer, but hell, they have a cool contrast on white skin which slutbags absolutely love. Also da lube keeps things moving smoothly.

This should get you on your way to getting your girl back. If these sure fire ways dont' win your girl back then she is lost forever and most likely a closet lezbo.
FieroPhrek working on that ls4 swap for 18 years and counting now. 18 years!!!!! LOL

530 whp is greater than 312
whipped
Posts: 4719
Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2005 11:17 am
Location: Bomb shelter, FL

Post by whipped »

Well I can't afford a lot of that stuff, so can I make substitutions?

I can't afford an S10, so what about a Geo tracker? Don't women like all 4x4s?

Second, aren't snorkles like $4.99 at walmart? Can I just use some PVC pipe ? I have some 4" pipe, but I don't know if it will fit, it might be too loose. I might be able to get some 8" pvc sewer pipe from a construction site??

Third, I can't afford black condoms or KY, so I was thinking of spray painting some seran wrap black, and using cooking oil. This will work ok too, right?
AkursedX
Turbo-boostin!
Posts: 1078
Joined: Wed Nov 17, 2004 2:14 pm
Location: Lackawanna, NY

Post by AkursedX »

whipped wrote:Well I can't afford a lot of that stuff, so can I make substitutions?

I can't afford an S10, so what about a Geo tracker? Don't women like all 4x4s?

Second, aren't snorkles like $4.99 at walmart? Can I just use some PVC pipe ? I have some 4" pipe, but I don't know if it will fit, it might be too loose. I might be able to get some 8" pvc sewer pipe from a construction site??

Third, I can't afford black condoms or KY, so I was thinking of spray painting some seran wrap black, and using cooking oil. This will work ok too, right?
LMAO!! Spoken like a TRUE "Fiero owner"
'88 Fiero GT- 3800 Turbo Best E.T. 11.36 Best MPH 121.50 (Sold and gone)
2021 Hyundai Veloster-N (SCCA Solo D-Street)
2004 Mazda RX-8 (SCCA Solo STX)
WNY SCCA-Region Auto-X Program Chair
User avatar
Shaun41178(2)
Posts: 8415
Joined: Fri Nov 19, 2004 7:12 pm
Location: Ben Phelps is an alleged scammer

Post by Shaun41178(2) »

Indeed spoken like a true Fiero owner.

Follow my advice man. Don't cheapen out. Chicks notice the little things man.
Post Reply